Life returns to what passes for normal around here.

The year’s at the spring,
And day’s at the morn;
Morning’s at seven;
The hill-side’s dew-pearled;
The lark’s on the wing;
The snail’s on the thorn;
God’s in his Heaven –
All’s right with the world!

 Pippa Passes, by Robert Browning (7 May 1812 – 12 December 1889)

I have repaired the wireless connection, which is good, because my son returns from GenCon Indianapolis 2008 this evening.  Actually, early tomorrow morning since he decided to take the train as it was easier than driving and cheaper than flying. 

I won’t miss the set up he has in his room.  It’s been useful, but it’s set up for someone with a spine 24 years younger than mine.  We won’t go into what has happened to my spine and other joints in the ensuing years.  I retired from the Army/Army Reserve with 27 years of service- `nuff said.

Having access to two computer, however, has given me more opportunity to write in my blog.  I can’t access it from work (which would be inappropriate anyway) and in the evenings when my wife and I are both home, it can be a race to see who gets to the keyboard first.  Andrew lives with us, and as an adult we give him his own space- which means we don’t enter his room without permission, nor do we use is equipment without permission. 

Getting his permission while he’s present, however, is akin to peeling a pomegranate.  As I mentioned in an earlier post, it’s not so much a computer as his electronic life support.  Yes, he still lives at home, even though he’s 29.  He’s what you might call a “late bloomer.” 

Actually, he’s more what you might call a NON-bloomer, since he has only recently began to develop friendships and relationships that do not involve the computer.  He has a form of autism known as Asperger’s Syndrome.  It may seem odd to some  that he’s never lived outside of the home,  but not to us. 

Asperger’s presents as above-average intelligence but below-average social skills– sounds like the definition of a nerd, doesn’t it??  Individuals can also exhibit obsessive/compulsive behavior and disorganized thought processes.  Andrew even had seizures when he was younger, for which he took medication.  He SEEMS to have out-grown them- we hope.  Albert Einstein is suspected of having had this disorder. 

As he gets older, Andy becomes more confident and able to deal with unexpected situations on his own.  However, he is definitely behind his peers, for whom he has little use.  I once asked him what it was he disliked so about people his own age.  He said he considered them “vapid.”  (Extra points if you know what that means- a gold star if you’ve ever used it in a sentence. ) 

He reads Time® magazine cover-to-cover every week, and has taught himself Japanese.  But if you could see him struggling with asking a simple question in a store or watch his frustration when something unexpected occurs that throws his plans off is to better understand why he’s still living at home.

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3 thoughts on “Life returns to what passes for normal around here.

  1. Does he write Japanese as well? Or just speak it?

    And, honestly, it seems if his peers were lively and entertaining, he’d probably dislike them as well because they’d be overwhelming to him.

  2. He can read Kanji and Kata, but I don’t know if he can do the calligraphy. He stopped trying to be a computer technician because he didn’t have the manual dexterity for some of the finer soldering. He’s trying to help some people translate games from Japanese. He used to do it just “for”, until I pointed out that there were copyright issues. Now he’s made some contacts at GenCon and on-line where he might get to start doing it legally.
    He CAN be quite personable & downright charming, but when he hits “tilt” the best thing he can do is leave– and DON’T try to stop him. He’s like Popeye “That’s all I can stands, `cause I can’t stands no more!” He has one really good friend here in town, but he lives in constant dread that he’s gonna go off on him some day, and he’ll lose him. It’s going to take a special woman to deal with him, and right now he says he has enough trouble dealing with his problem without asking someone else to do so. He is kind, softhearted, conscientious and loyal, but what’s OK one day will set him off the next. He’s learning how to deal with it, and he desperately WANTS to get out on his own, but for now he needs the structure that we can provide.

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